I Hate Jill Zarin The Real Housewives of New York – Let’s Chat!
Feel free to chat during the Real Housewives of New York!
While you’re waiting for the show to air, take a look at my latest portrait:
Jill found an article about reality stars running for local government offices, she had this to say:
Definitely Jill I think you should run, run very far away, run to Siberia or Iceland, somewhere that has a very small population so as to annoy the least amount of people.
Her ridiculous comment prompted me to write my take on Jill Zarin as a politician:
Jill Zarin: ”Bawwwby! Bawwwby! I can’t work like this, these people dress like my sister Lisa, they’re all idiots Bawwby, they look like they’re wearing clothes from Kohls or Marshalls or something. I’ve never seen so much polyester in my life! How do they expect me to work when they’re carrying no name Handbags and wearing flats, do they think they’re fashionable? All they do is talk talk talk, they talk about schools, Bawby I don’t care about that stuff, my Ally is in college, do they think I care about these public schools, besides my Ally went to private school in a private jet everyday thanks to you , I adore you Bawwby, remind me sweetie, I owe you in the bedroom later for those diamond earrings. I know they were expensive but I had to have them, did you see those earrings that Jason got for Bethenny? No way is she going to have bigger diamond earrings than me, but don’t worry Bawby, I’ll earn them you sexy man you!
We both know those reports are all BS, there’s no way that Bethenny could have more money than me…er us. I wish I was still friends with her when her father died, I am just dying to know if she got all of his money, you know Bawby, I’ll bet she did. I’ll bet Bobby Frankel left her every dime, but he didn’t have as much money as you my Bawwby! They’re all saying on the internet that Bethenny has more money than me…er us Bawby they’re saying that, it’s not true, is it Bawby? No, it can’t be true, we put a roof over her head and food in her mouth. We are richer than her, ain’t we Bawby? Ain’t we? If she has more money it isn’t because of her stupid margaritas, she got money from her father Bawby, didn’t she?
That last council meeting was so booooring Bawby, I don’t know why they make me sit through that stuff, I don’t care about the parks and if they are safe or not, I don’t have any kids playing in the parks, what the Fudge! Bethenny’s kid will be playing in those parks soon, let her with all her money pay for new parks, haha, I’m funny, ain’t I Bawby? Ain’t I funny? I told those idiots that too, people with little kids should be paying for that stuff, not me…er us. I told them they should move that big huge bridge in front of our building Bawby, wasn’t that a great idea? I am tired of people on the internet saying that I live under a bridge, that isn’t funny but the city could move that bridge instead of wasting money on schools and parks, they couldn’t say I live under a bridge anymore, I loved my idea, isn’t it a great idea Bawby? How nice would that look if that ugly bridge was gone?
You know Bawby that one lady who sits two seats away from me on the City Council, I told her she could really use my Sqweeze undergarments, I gave her the web site to go to buy herself some, she really needs to wear them, don’t you think so Bawby? Oh and Bawby, you would be so proud of me, when they were talking about the fundraiser for something or another, I told them that I would host it at Zarin fabrics, ain’t I smart Bawby? Ain’t I? Did you see those awful chairs in the council room? They need to be covered with new fabric and I told them I would give them a discount at Zarin Fabrics, those chairs are hideous Bawby, I can’t sit on those hideous chairs anymore. Next week Bawby, you know what I’m gonna do? I told my assistant Darren to bring a case of my books to the Council room, he’s going to set up a table for me to sell and sign my books after the meeting is over, wasn’t that smart Bawby? Yes, Bawby, I know there are too many cases of books in the basement of Zarin Fabrics that’s why I am going to bring a few cases to the council meeting, those people could use my advice, they need my book. I’m even going to autograph them for a few dollars more, but I’m giving council members a discount, if they buy 5 of my books, I will sign one of them for free. Ain’t I a genius Bawby? The basement will be empty before you know it. This politics stuff is so easy Bawby, I don’t know why they’re always complaining, I’m going to run for Mayor of New York next, who knows someday I may take Obama’s seat, he’s President, right? Yeah, I could do that job, I’m going to send Michelle Obama some of my Sqweeze wear Bawby, she needs it, don’t you think? I think she needs it Bawby. I gotta go Bawby, I gotta take Ginger to get fitted for that diamond dog collar you promised to pay for…I’ll see ya lata Bawby!”
Real Housewives of New York blog right here tomorrow!