Thanks to Boston02127 for her latest gem:
The Real Housewives of New Jersey
I know this is supposed to be a Teresa vs. Melissa season but the one who irritated me the most on this episode was Caroline Manzo. Who the hell does this woman think she is? She is starting to believe all of her hype as the mother hen, the all-knowing high Priestess of New Jersey, sickening!
Caroline ruined a nice fall day at Teresa’s house with all the children carving pumpkins and having a nice afternoon. She decided she was going to tell Teresa what it is and how to behave. While the ladies and children are in Teresa’s yard carving pumpkins and talking about the Christening battle, Joe Giudice is in his kitchen, refuses to change his child’s diaper because he’s eating and grins as he spills his side of the Christening fight to Chris Laurita and Albie Manzo. Teresa is supervising four children while carving pumpkins and this ass, Joe Giudice won’t even change his daughter’s diaper because he’s forever shoving food into his mouth. What a prize this man is!
With never-ending flashbacks of the Christening Party why couldn’t they show the one scene that Teresa and Kathy were arguing about? We saw as Teresa’s youngest child, Adrianna was trying to crawl out of her stroller while the fighting was going on, I know what I saw and I saw no adults anywhere near her. Joe and Teresa were dancing with Melissa’s baby for what Melissa describes as a long time, then they were both over at the Gorga’s table at the same time so who was watching Teresa’s children? I don’t think that Teresa is a bad mother, I really don’t but she wasn’t thinking about her children as she started that battle with her brother and his wife, and lets not forget that last week little Adrianna was rescued from falling down that huge staircase by the hairdresser because Teresa was too focused on beautifying her older daughters.
Back to the fall festivities, the Giudice’s, Laurita’s and Manzo’s all got together to carve pumpkins at Terea’s house. When the subject of the Christening brawl was brought up and Caroline decided that she has to give Teresa advice and tell everyone how things should go down going forward, little Gia was disgusted and didn’t want to hear about it. Teresa’s talking head interview reveals what we all already know, Caroline should really shut the hell up. Teresa tells us that she doesn’t need Caroline’s advice because she’s the matriarch of her own family. Who is she kidding? Hell, Teresa can’t even spell matriarch.
On Halloween we saw the very different way the families celebrate. The Giudice’s had a kid’s party to celebrate Halloween while the Gorga’s went out dancing after taking the kids trick or treating. Melissa invited Kim D who brought Kim G with her, unfortunately this is the woman who simply will not go away. Kim G acts like a child, she’s so immature it is ridiculous. Kim G was so excited about the fashion show because she was hoping for a repeat brawl like last year.
Albert Manzo is overseeing the set up of the Fashion Show at his restaurant The Brownstone, Caroline tells us that since her son Christopher has moved on and no longer works there, Albert simply cannot retire or even slow down. What? No one else can over see tables being set up? This is a skill that only a Manzo can perform? Albert tells us that he provided the maximum amount of people that can safely be admitted to the Posche Fashion Show then says that amount was exceeded by 100. Luckily the Manzo’s have the Fire Chief in their back pocket or they may have gotten hit with a fire/life/safety violation. The way those guests were jammed into the Brownstone they are all very lucky there wasn’t a fire.
As Teresa arrives Melissa and Kathy are already getting their make up done and she predictably acts as if nothing has happened. Teresa greets both women with a phoney kiss and fake smile then screams at Caroline at the top of her lungs twice when Caroline dares to speak to Melissa and Kathy. “Caroline is MY friend” Teresa reminds viewers, “Melissa and Kathy are sucking up to Caroline” she says. It was pretty clear that Melissa was trapped in a make up chair and Caroline made her way over to talk to Melissa to say hello and chat, not the other way around. Get a grip Tree, you can HAVE Caroline, who the hell else would want her?
Jacqueline was the first to walk in the fashion show and she unnecessarily tells us that she is no good at it, Melissa is over the top and does her walk twice at the urging of Kim D while Caroline describes Teresa accurately as stiff and forced. The best part of the show is that we didn’t have to tolerate Ashley Holmes appearing on stage. The mentally stunted Kim G asks her table mates if they should all “Boo” Teresa then giggles like a 13-year old. She and Kelly Bensimon should really get together, they’re the same mental age.
After the show Kathy makes an attempt to talk to Teresa, Kathy explains that she’s talking to Tree but no one is home, she’s simply not listening. Teresa is blaming the entire thing on her brother yet he and Melissa believe that Teresa owes them an apology. When Kathy tells Teresa that she attempted to protect the children at the Christening battle Teresa freaks out and refuses to acknowledge that she left her youngest daughter unattended. Where was the usual Bravo flashback showing that Kathy was indeed telling the truth? We saw that little baby sitting alone in her stroller trying to climb out of it with no parents in sight. Gia tried to pull her mother away from the arguing and was crying hysterically when Kathy tried to calm her down. “I don’t want them to fight” Gia said to Kathy.
Once again Caroline decides to stick her nose into something that is none of her business, she yells at Melissa “You’re family, Fix it!” then tells Kathy to go kill each other in your hown homes. Great advice Caroline, you write an advice column, huh? Teresa was the first to raise her voice and scream at Kathy yet Caroline said nothing to her.
I’m really tired of Caroline Manzo and her “perfect” life, she acts like she is so perfect, is the perfect mother, the perfect wife and gives such great advice that everyone has to listen to her and do as she says. This woman who made a complete fool of herself at last season’s reunion and is so ignorant that she thinks Italian people in the south can’t cook Italian food because they don’t live in Jersey? Who would ask this woman for advice? You’re a moron Caroline Manzo…own it!
I’m firmly on Team Melissa, it may not be the popular choice but I’m surprised at the number of people who have forgotten all that Teresa has said and done in the past three years. Have people forgotten all the legal trouble that her husband has gotten into? I haven’t seen Joe Gorga in the news for drunk driving, driving without a license and attempting to get a driver’s license in someone else’s name. Not to mention forgery, lying on their Bankruptcy documents, hiding assets, scamming people out of money…and the list goes on. Teresa pretending she didn’t know about any of this is a joke!
I wasn’t surprised by the Watch What Happens Live poll results, the Twitter fans went ape shit crazy against Melissa in support of Teresa while the show was airing so when Teresa won the battle with 94% of the vote it was not a shock. Clearly I don’t agree, Teresa Giudice is a liar and her husband is an untrained animal but I recognize that viewers are slow to warm up to a new housewife. I won’t deny that Teresa has a lot of fans, I’m simply not one of them.
I think Andy was hoping to get a rise out of Teresa and get her to say some shocking things against her sister-in-law Melissa and her cousin Kathy but apparently the kool-aid Teresa was drinking wasn’t strong enough. Andy should have fed her some of his Maker’s Mark if he really wanted to get her riled up.
Jacqueline joined Teresa on Watch What Happens Live and apparently recognized that the show was boring so when she won a small ham in tonight’s game she stuck it up her dress making it appear as though she had a penis. Why she did this, there no way of knowing. I don’t think Andy was too happy about this stunt because his next question, a serious one about Jac’s daughter Ashley never got answered because Teresa was playing with Jacqueline’s ham in her crotch. I know, it was very strange. Andy even said, “Respect the ham!” Maybe this is a Jersey thing, they can only play with ham. The Manzo children throw sliced boiled ham at each other and Jacqueline sticks ham up her dress. Remind me never to eat ham in New Jersey.
Andy’s three obsessions tonight:
1. The Halloween costumes worn by the Jersey cast
2. Kim G’s reappearance on the Real Housewives of New Jersey. Andy wondered if she was constipated as she likes to start crap.
3. The Posche Fashion Show and the New Jersey Housewives walk the runway, Andy wants them to learn from Teresa’s daughter Gia and ran the footage of Gia practicing her runway walk…AGAIN and again and again.
Apparently the Watch What Happens Live crew didn’t have their delay button handy as Teresa slipped and said the word “Shit” but really they should have bleeped the entire sentence that Teresa said. It included a lie, a swear word and a double negative.
“Danielle kept attacking me and I couldn’t take her shit no more.”
This was in response to a question about Teresa taking some responsibility for things that have happened on the show. She took no responsibility for anything, no surprise there. We’re supposed to believe that this women writes her own blogs? Not a chance!
I loved the way Andy kept asking Teresa if she understood the jokes he was making, we’ve seen so many times things going right over her head so tonight Andy kept saying to Teresa, “do you get it?” just to make sure she “got it!” Hysterical!
Andy asked Teresa why she completely freaked out and the “Gorga switch” went off when Danielle mentioned her sister-in-law Melissa on the last season reunion. Teresa said she didn’t know how Danielle knew Melissa’s name. Is she kidding? By the time the reunion filmed many people knew Melissa’s name, she was already rumored to be the newest New Jersey Housewife and she was already chatting with viewers on Twitter.
Typical Teresa doesn’t think she’s done anything wrong and took no responsibility for anything.
Last week I tweeted my RHONJ blog to both of Melissa’s sisters and I got a private message back from one of them with a very nice message telling me it was funny and thanking me for seeing and writing about the truth about her sister and Teresa.
The New Jersey ladies have posted their blogs and included there is a bonus blog written by Jay Mohr, Jay is cute and funny and all that but he doesn’t really give his opinion, whose side are you on Jay? Grow a pair and tell us what you really think! Take a look:
Tonight on Bravo the season finale of Pregnant In Heels, I don’t think too many will be upset that this series is ending. Quincy has done a fantastic job of recapping the shows and will post her final blog about PIH tomorrow morning along with my thoughts on what these wacky housewives are up to.
Until Next Time…